Nana's Club: Mysterious girl, from a yappy girl

Hi sugars !!

Soooo, what are your thougths on the whole mysterious attitude trend going on ? 🙊

I know it's no news, it's been going on for a while, but I've been thinking about it lately.

A random guy from college, who I was getting to know, during class told me after three hours spent together that I was mysterious...And surprinsigly I didn't like that. I felt an instant distance between him and I.

Usually I'm the yappy girl, the one that overshares, that has so much energy and laughs all the time. Sunshine is litteraly my nickname ☀️! But, on the other hand, my big sister, who's two years older, was always the mysterious one, always affiliated to the moon 🌙. Very quite, distinguish, put together.

And I always felt too much next to her, too open, and for years I tried to be like her. I tried to shut myself, to say less, laugh less, be a little less, so that I could be the cool mysterious girl, like in the movies.

Elena Gilbert from the vampire diraries 🦇, I'm sure you're familiar with, has this thing going on about her. Or maybe most main characters in shows do ? You know the thing, that makes her interesting because she doesn't give you enough to understand her but enough to get some clues. And you turn into Sherlock Holmes trying to fit the pieces together, like she is some kind of puzzle to solve. Well, that is who I always wanted to be.

Now, let's go back to this interaction I had with this guy. I hated the feeling I had when he told me this. Which made me understand something.

Being open and vulnerable is the best way to give people access to yourself. If you restrain yourself to fit a mold, not only is it going to be visible but it's also making you distant. And I would understand that as human beings we need connections, we need the warmth of being close to people.

And I believe that this whole thing about being distant, "nonchalant", giving less to people is the best way to ruin human connections. It's the best way to be litteraly distant from other people.

So my take is, stop trying to be someone you're not (obviously) but also stop trying to be less. It's by giving, that people will give you back, and it's by being open that you'll feel free. Not only in your relationships but also because being true to yourself is so liberating. So while I'm not telling you it's easy to be yourself and open, I vividly encourage you to be more. Always.

(Fran is my litteral Icon 💗💗)

To little me, No, it's not cool being distant, or being someone else. Being nonchalant and mysterious can cause you to feel detached from other people. Don't lose the warmth of your relationships to be cool and cold. It's not worth it. And to all my Sugars, take this advice, you deserve to feel intimate connections, and to be free xxx

Cheers,

Nana 💖